The 'Carrot Top' and the beer belly

I was not planning on updating twice in a day but it seemed imminent that I rush to update before I forget the thoughts hustling and bustling in my head. The positives of running behind a, well... um carrot top. As mentioned earlier in my prior post (the hulk hogan), this was what I instantly thought about in my head 'orange skin and almost green hair'. However, in the context of this article it is a good thing.

"A carrot is that fellow runner in the race that looks especially nice in their running gear and helps you keep a nice steady pace. A pace that perhaps that may be slower or faster than you normally run but yet on this day it seems to be the perfect pace. Like a carrot in front of the horse that keeps it moving. Ideally the carrot is a runner that keeps a pace just above where you want to be...."
-http://www.elitefeet.com/running-behind-a-carrot



Ok, ok. She is hot. Looks slightly ridiculous with the orangey tan, but she is not totally as bad as people make it out to be. I'd give my whole right side of my ass to fit into those shorts and pull them off. Hopefully after my little experiment I will be able too. In the mean time, this article uses the perfect example most girls bash, as the center target of the dart board for men. They are great to look at, easy to run with, and become the cheese for the mouse. Or maybe we should say, rat? Either way, its like placing a bottle of Argentinian Malbec wine on a 10 foot shelf above me. I will jump, and jump.... and jump some more till I get that damn thing. The result is worth the work and effort. Do men think the same way about carrots like I think about Malbec?

Speaking of wine, who here finds it nearly impossible to diet correctly because some source of alcohol is involved? I believe in my mind about 50-70 invisible hands went up. It's not that I have a problem or that i can't stop drinking. But I think a glass of wine 2 or 3 nights a week is perfectly adequate for my lifestyle right now. Nothing overboard, just enough to enjoy the grapes, fragrances, and the buzz. Speaking of the buzz, okay, number 1 rule in dieting is cut out alcohol completely. And if you cant do that, then at least cut out the beer. If you don't then, there is the unspeakable, and unthinkable result of a beer belly. Good Lord! And of course, good old me, i do my research and find out that my FAVORITE beer of all time, is one of the worst for you. Yes ladies and gentlemen, Blue moon has the most carbs out of about a good 20 other options. The orange, the wheaty taste, its all so delicious and of- freaking course- its the worst one for the 6 pack I have under some warm winter layers. Dieting requires sacrifices and this is by far a big one. I do not like most beers but blue moon is just one-of-a-kind. Nevertheless, I have resorted and opted to Michelob Ultra or Bud Light if I drink anything at all Now there is always the argument, "Well I just wont eat all day and then I can drink all of my calories." I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this, especially from girls. I even heard some one once say to me, "If you drink clear liquor, like cheap vodka, it goes down without as many calories." OK I cant even say anything to that except sigh and shake my head.... hello? Girls, c'mon we really aren't that dumb. . In response to drinking calories, yea that's just uncalled for too.

From my experience and my observation, women love to drink, and binge eat, a lot. It is just natural. And then you wake up hung over and have another beer to cure it. Then to 'soak-up' all the leftover booze in the stomach, I have seen many resort to the very greasy fried foods in hopes that the headache and the shits will just disappear. It seems that this becomes a case-by-case cycle in which one continually seems to be trying to fix their mistakes by covering it up with something else. Therefore in resorting to one thing such as food or binge drinking I CAN PROMISE YOU, it will come out of the frigging' dark..... the beer belly.

For the girls who can continually drink and avoid this feat I have something to say to you, "I hate you."

For all the others who can COMPLETELY relate, well first off you are not alone. Secondly, I have some very bad news. There's no way around the beer belly. You can maybe dodge the wine gut for a few months but you must work out, and sadly probably run into about 5 carrots in the gym who make you feel like shit and you leave feeling worse and go home and guzzle a few beers. DO NOT DO IT. Fight the urge and have tunnel vision till the first 5 pounds are off. Then after that move forward.

Alicia says in The Kind Diet, that it is okay to 'enjoy' life and have an occasional glass of wine. Hell, they have proven that having a glass of wine a day fights heart disease. By all means moderation is better than binging. In the meantime, consider each drink you have to be about 150 cals. Now, let's estimate. The average drinker on a Saturday night who is in college is taking in about 5 drinks. Multiply that by 5 and you have reached 750 calories. Leaving about zip to enjoy any food except a carrot for the rest of the day. Bad idea.

And for the vegans there is all organic wine available. It is rare and only comes by the one's but there is an option for the strict vegans. This, however, is not an option I am willing to pursue just yet. I love my wine. I can cut out everything for a little while. .But red wine will always have the best of me and I would rather have a glass of that then a sandwhich.

In conclusion remember, before you guzzle that beer, think about it, its gonna take you 10 minutes on the treadmill to burn just ONE.