The monogamous 15 and the your naked self.

Did you ever hear of the freshman 15? You know, when a student finally sets sails into college and without the help of high school athletics, packs on about 10-15 lbs from both drinking and just the adjustment? I was not one of those freshmen. I came to school driven to surpass the freshman 15 and spent my mornings at 7 am running a few miles at a time followed by sit-ups and push ups. Given, after I stopped playing basketball in high school I gained a few but after that I was rock steady and keeping my 'healthy curvy' body. I look at pictures from my freshmen year and I admit, I looked better than I expected I would with the dreaded curse.

But then somewhere between overachieving and getting my repetitive dean's list GPA and making it out to parties to play beer pong I stacked about 13 pounds on. Luckily with my 68 inch height it wasn't that noticeable or at least I keep telling myself that. I mean if I was 5'1'' I think 13 pounds would clearly plump me up. However; I still am not thrilled with the fact that out of nowhere in the blink of an eye I was not fitting into my jeans from freshman year anymore. For anyone who knows where I am coming from, it is the worst thing in the world to come out of summer and in the first fall day, try on that pair of jeans that you can't even get up past your thighs. Like, it is literally the worst feeling ever. I believe just about everyone, or maybe I am just awkward, finds a reason why they don't fit. My first thought? My damn mother must have shrunk these damn things. *even though she hasn't done my laundry for two years now*

Okay am I alone here? I have spent the last few months doing everything I could to keep the weight from packing on and trying to lose what I put on between sophomore and junior year of college. First off, I think in between those years I was dealing with a lot of personal issues and did what us women do best..... eat my feelings. And did I ever.

I remember in those years talking to men about my insecurities and they would all say the same things ,

"Every girl gains weight after high school...." It was followed by some kind of theory that was actually POSITIVE.

Now I don't know about you but my theory? Guys like a girl that can hang with them, drink with them and not count every single calorie. In that sense, and in building relationships just like 'shazaaaaam' the little and excuse my language 'bastards' creep up on you and next thing you know you're not a size 8 anymore.

Which leads me to my theory.....

I believe that if woman aren't gaining the freshman 15 and are single then they are somewhat motivated to stay skinny and keep the heads turning. I have seen a reoccurring pattern with myself and many many of my girls. All of us were wicked skinny and looking our best when we didn't have anyone to impress. Then once we got comfortable- comfort won the battle and all of a sudden the weight packs on.

I once read a quote and it said this :::::

"The difference between your wife before marriage and your wife after marriage is simple.... 20 pounds."

How freaking depressing!!!!!! I refuse to be the 20 pound more heavy wife. So things need to change now.

And did you ever notice how men seem to just shrink in hours of watching what they eat? My boyfriend will watch what he eats for a week, run maybe once, and somehow drop 10 lbs. I have zero idea what he is doing that I'm not. I mean I'll cut dairy and eat celery sticks and grapefruit for a week straight, run 3 -5 miles every single day and gain 3 lbs. I mean COME ON!

I think we all want what we don't have. For those of you who don't know me to see me I have always been a curvacious woman with an ass and seemingly in the past 5 years a set of boobs too. But these assets don't come alone. They come with hips, thighs, tummy and arms.

Who would I love to look like?




Absolutely. Kate Hudson is just soooooo beautiful. Given, she has zero boobs and not much butt she still has this body that just screams *beautiful*. Well it's either that or my desire to be blonde - knowingly that I couldn't ever pull it off.



Okay my next topic.

How do you feel when you get out of the shower, wrapped in a towel and staring in the mirror? Do you think you are beautiful? I think, and especially after watching the Miss USA pageant, that society ruptures our idea of what is beautiful. I mean I'll look at myself and lie to the mirror,

"Oh ya, real beautiful.... oh my Gosh is that another stretch mark? My pores suck. My calves are too wide. My skin's not tan enough."

Good Lord. Please tell me I'm not alone here! I think it is important that we all face our insecurities and learn to embrace them. In a society where it's beautiful to be natural and horrible to be above a size 6 how are we supposed to function?

Can you honestly look in the mirror and say, "Alright you damn fine piece of a**, go get em'"

I don't think so.

So in the meantime. Besides my overwhelming amount of thoughts today, tomorrow morning- look in the mirror. Tell you, and the REAL you, that you're beautiful. You deserve the extra love and keep working for your better self.

Good night.

Failed Miserably

Well.

Today has been quite interesting and will make for an intriguing entry today. I found this GREAT looking recipe in Alicia's book with rice couscous and veggies. So i prepped for it all day. Bought the veggies a day ago, and the rice and cut them all up. I cracked open a bottle of camenere red wine, which is perfectly complimenting vegetables because it is VERY full bodied. Anyway, I cut everything up and started roasting the vegetables. I was so excited. I felt like a master in the kitchen.....Once i started cooking the rice I knew it was going to be a great night. Compliments left and right and all of those great things that make you feel like a better person, just because you can 'cook'.

Depressingly, it turned out opposite. No one warned me that rice couscous tasted like.... well, uh.... shit. I LOVE rice. You're talking to the girl who would eat rice as her midnight snack growing up. However, this time things were different much different. and OF COURSE I decided to mix in all of the vegetables and get everything going. Oh lord.



How pretty does that look? I paired it with a spinach salad and had apples and walnuts and some other left over veggies in it. It looks so pretty doesn't it?

Yea. It didn't taste that pretty. I didn't a type of rice could have that terrible of a flavor. I used the vegetable broth Alicia called for as well and that i think did it in for good. It tasted DREADFUL. After two bites and finishing my spinach salad I knew it was game over. My boyfriend, the trooper that he is, fought through the terrible results and now is experiencing some discomfort accompanied with stomach aches/pains. I'm pretty sure that recipe went to shit and back.

I feel like a failure.

And to top it off, out of anger, hunger, and complete exhaustion, I ordered a salad from Giovanni's. It will do for now. No meat, no cheese. Just good old lettuce and veggies. In the meantime, I am drowning in my failure with Jeopardy. Friends, do not opt to the rice couscous unless you are entirely aware of what it tastes like and if you would like it. Not every meal is going to be perfect, I guess the most I can say is.... at least I tried.


How depressing.

Eden's Market

Today started off with a great run. The cold and cloudy weather wasn't my pristine running conditions but still a nice break from all the rain we have been getting. I ate pretty well today stayed completely with my vegetarian change. I'm easing into this vegan thing. It is something that seems impossible to just go 'cold turkey' and start. I feel like I would crash and burn instantly. I think a lot of things are like that in life. You need to EASE into the change. I think that cutting meat out of the diet will be easier than I thought; however, I most certainly think cutting sugars and dairies and eggs is going to take a lot more work. My big issue is with the sugars. And when I say sugars... I am talking Red Bull. After 4 solid years of relying on them for my caffeine and my brain power I have found myself really struggling the last few days. I have been extremely tired and willing to sleep at the snap of a finger. Today after my run, I met my mom with my boyfriend and we had a great lunch at Il Pizzaiolo in Mt. Lebo. This place was spectacular. I ordered an antipasti that was filled with roasted and marinated vegetables that were extremely delicious. My mom and boyfriend both got salmon panini's and devoured them.




This was my dish. It was with marinated spinach, green beans, artichokes, zucchini, eggplant, peppers, mushrooms (which I just can't bring myself to like) and homemade bread with oils. It was healthy light and I accompanied it with a glass of Stella's Pinot Grigio. It was the perfect mixture. I highly HIGHLY recommend this place. It looked as if their pizza was the speciality and I fought with the devil on my shoulder on ordering a small one for the three of us but opted on the fresh vegetables which were a definite win. Also, customer be aware that my vegetables came cold, as advertised. If I wasn't so hard pressed on asking questions I wouldn't have known and probably would have been thrown back. Other than that, for lunch it was packed and the wine selection seemed adequate for a smaller restaurant with great service and REAL Italian variety. I very much enjoyed it. And see! You CAN eat Italian and still maintain faith to a diet/lifestyle change. I will, however, dream of that pizza tonight.

On an EVEN better note, while killing time we were walking the main street in Mt. Lebo and stumbled upon a sign for a 'Eden's Market'. I was thrilled because it was something with MY name! I never see 'Eden' stuff. Which by the way- it sucks being a little kid and going to a store looking for the magnets with names on it and finding everyone Else's name in the family except for yours. Regardless, I walked in and was greeted by two people, I was assuming they were the owners. They were SO helpful. I got a entire rundown on what everything was in the store and learned that they provided a vast quality of organic, vegan, gluten-free, and vegetarian products (ranging from vitamins to dog food). These people were SO friendly. I explained that I was attempting to change my lifestyle towards vegan and slowly doing it. The lady was so helpful and explained that it takes time but it is SUCH a great thing to do. I then learned that their store was named after their daughter, Eden. That was exciting- I got to see a picture of her and hear about how they started the store and what their goals were. Beyond supporting local organic produce they really preached an organic and holistic lifestyle. They reeled my mom in who has a history of stomach issues by throwing out the idea of a gluten free diet (which is where the store really becomes unique).

A gluten free diet is EXTREMELY strict and is something I wouldn't really consider unless I HAD to. I just couldn't deal with the drastic changes I would have to make and the things I would have to sacrifice to stay faithful to the diet. Either way, the lady preached the possibility of going gluten free because it has been known to heal things like lupus (again, how freaking ironic is it that she named the one disease I am diagnosed with) and colitis, which is something my mom has been diagnosed with for years. Unbelievable, it just SHOCKS me how there is proof after proof that changing what you eat can actually change how you feel. I actually feel as if my eyes have been opened up for the first time.

Anyway, among the many products I ended up with some organic cheese (vegan failure, I know- but it was all grass fed organic, I couldn't resist), some tea and a few other things. I am sold on trying this and seeing how it works. Like I said, slowly but surely. One change I have seen though is that since I have diligently cut out dairy my skin has cleared up wonderfully and people have started to compliment me! How crazy and in only 5 days in! I adore cheese and prior to this I was eating random pieces every other hour or so as a 'snack'. Cutting it out has been VERY hard but seemingly is paying off.

Anyway, do yourself a favor- go into Eden's Market. You'll love what you get, and the service makes it worth the while. The owners are extremely knowledgeable and do what they do because they believe in and it, and it is who they are. There is no rush to make the big $$. It's simply passion at its best and you will be happy you did it. Believe me. Even switching your everyday supplements is a huge improvement. Taking many baby steps results in large strides towards a better you and a longer life. Do it for yourself.

Eden's Market can be found at::::

99 Alfred Street
Rt 19 Washington Road
@ Clearview Commons Fountain
Mt. Lebanon, PA
15228

(412) 343-1802

Have a great night :-)

Our Father of Carbs

Hope everyone is doing well on this rainy Wednesday evening. The Pittsburgh Penguins are playing, and like a good 'dieter' I am staying in and having ONE glass of white wine compared to the drink specials offered by Carson City Tavern. Which encourages Penguin fans to go there and in honor of any home player that scores a great drink special is incorporated. Penguin game viewers always leave there feeling fabulous and waking up hungover. It ends up that you either drink to celebrate or drink because you're depressed they lost. It is most defintely an experience if you are a first time visitor in Pittsburgh and it's Pens hockey season.


Anyway, Dancing with the Stars was interesting last night, along with my addiction, Lost.

Niecy Nash and Louis Van Amstel got the boot and I was bummed. It was great to see a curvy girl go so far. Nash has a fabulous personality and just seems genuine. She started the season saying she didn't want to lose any weight but I do think she slimmed down a slight bit. Either that or the stylist did her well.



I'm just glad she stayed longer than Kate Gosselin, I mean c'mon. That lady was just asking for someone to talk bad about her. Such drama. Jon, stay away, she's a monster.

Anyway my topic for this evening is a thing that we face everyday. I noticed it today and have always experienced a large depth of ocean of ideas accompanying the thoughts of it. Decisions.

Yes, thats right. Decisions.

Today I have FAILED miserably at my vegan lifestyle. However I did stay completely vegetarian today. I woke up bright and early and decided to start the day off with Eat n' Park. In the car on the way there I already had it in my mind,

"Egg whites and fruit."

I kept telling myself over and OVER. I ordered just that with hot tea. It was healthy and all protein. I struggle with the idea that eggs are not legit with The Kind Diet. Eggs are filled with protein and theres so much benefit from them. I beg to differ, Alicia.

Anyway I made my DECISIONS and ordered nice and healthy. While I was eating I couldn't help but think, when it comes to dieting and even life...We are surrounded by decisions. You decide to wake up and get out of bed. You decide whether or not to shower, or work out. Everything we do and exactly how we function is all based on decisions we can or cannot make. My diet crashed and burned today because in the midst of moving my boyfriend into my house with me, I was bombarded with the idea of an easy meal, pizza.

How wonderful is that creation? You call a man and TRUST he is going to make you a top choice pizza, and decide to put your entire diet in the hands of a complete stranger. It's like the pill example I used yesterday. We never take random pills from a stranger just expecting they are going to rid us of a headache unless we KNOW what it is made of. Why do we treat food any different? Anyway, the pizza was phenomonal. I ate like three pieces, left the crust and picked at a veggie hoagie. In the midst of being lazy and hungry I CHOSE to eat like hell. God I should have just snacked on some carrots or something. I think I will just make up for it tomorrow by running an extra mile or seven.

Do you see what I mean. We have the entire opportunity to eat this....



Or this....



One tastes delicious and the other tastes like water and well, celery.... its hard to describe that taste.

I actually do like celery...... If its accompanied with peanut butter or blue cheese till then, I will just be forcing it down plain.... What a battle to fight!


A decision is such a small thing, when it comes to food. It should be like adding 2+2, you don't need to think, you just know It equals 4 or you should just get something healthy and nutritious. But of course the food Satan has to come and tempt all of us to make the wrong choices towards pizza, potato skins or just a large filet mignon. They should have a food bible. Where they fight off the evil foods that create sins and encourage healthy food which will open the gates to eternal skinny-ness.

Our Father,
Who aren't in melted cheese
whole grains be my name
Thy skinny-ness come,
or thy will be plump, on carbs
as I wish I could in heaven
Give us this day
as much bread and white flour as possible
And forgive us our
trespasses with cheese
as it trespasses against us
And My God Let us avoid temptation
But deliver us away from red bull and chocolate
Amen.

The 'Carrot Top' and the beer belly

I was not planning on updating twice in a day but it seemed imminent that I rush to update before I forget the thoughts hustling and bustling in my head. The positives of running behind a, well... um carrot top. As mentioned earlier in my prior post (the hulk hogan), this was what I instantly thought about in my head 'orange skin and almost green hair'. However, in the context of this article it is a good thing.

"A carrot is that fellow runner in the race that looks especially nice in their running gear and helps you keep a nice steady pace. A pace that perhaps that may be slower or faster than you normally run but yet on this day it seems to be the perfect pace. Like a carrot in front of the horse that keeps it moving. Ideally the carrot is a runner that keeps a pace just above where you want to be...."
-http://www.elitefeet.com/running-behind-a-carrot



Ok, ok. She is hot. Looks slightly ridiculous with the orangey tan, but she is not totally as bad as people make it out to be. I'd give my whole right side of my ass to fit into those shorts and pull them off. Hopefully after my little experiment I will be able too. In the mean time, this article uses the perfect example most girls bash, as the center target of the dart board for men. They are great to look at, easy to run with, and become the cheese for the mouse. Or maybe we should say, rat? Either way, its like placing a bottle of Argentinian Malbec wine on a 10 foot shelf above me. I will jump, and jump.... and jump some more till I get that damn thing. The result is worth the work and effort. Do men think the same way about carrots like I think about Malbec?

Speaking of wine, who here finds it nearly impossible to diet correctly because some source of alcohol is involved? I believe in my mind about 50-70 invisible hands went up. It's not that I have a problem or that i can't stop drinking. But I think a glass of wine 2 or 3 nights a week is perfectly adequate for my lifestyle right now. Nothing overboard, just enough to enjoy the grapes, fragrances, and the buzz. Speaking of the buzz, okay, number 1 rule in dieting is cut out alcohol completely. And if you cant do that, then at least cut out the beer. If you don't then, there is the unspeakable, and unthinkable result of a beer belly. Good Lord! And of course, good old me, i do my research and find out that my FAVORITE beer of all time, is one of the worst for you. Yes ladies and gentlemen, Blue moon has the most carbs out of about a good 20 other options. The orange, the wheaty taste, its all so delicious and of- freaking course- its the worst one for the 6 pack I have under some warm winter layers. Dieting requires sacrifices and this is by far a big one. I do not like most beers but blue moon is just one-of-a-kind. Nevertheless, I have resorted and opted to Michelob Ultra or Bud Light if I drink anything at all Now there is always the argument, "Well I just wont eat all day and then I can drink all of my calories." I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this, especially from girls. I even heard some one once say to me, "If you drink clear liquor, like cheap vodka, it goes down without as many calories." OK I cant even say anything to that except sigh and shake my head.... hello? Girls, c'mon we really aren't that dumb. . In response to drinking calories, yea that's just uncalled for too.

From my experience and my observation, women love to drink, and binge eat, a lot. It is just natural. And then you wake up hung over and have another beer to cure it. Then to 'soak-up' all the leftover booze in the stomach, I have seen many resort to the very greasy fried foods in hopes that the headache and the shits will just disappear. It seems that this becomes a case-by-case cycle in which one continually seems to be trying to fix their mistakes by covering it up with something else. Therefore in resorting to one thing such as food or binge drinking I CAN PROMISE YOU, it will come out of the frigging' dark..... the beer belly.

For the girls who can continually drink and avoid this feat I have something to say to you, "I hate you."

For all the others who can COMPLETELY relate, well first off you are not alone. Secondly, I have some very bad news. There's no way around the beer belly. You can maybe dodge the wine gut for a few months but you must work out, and sadly probably run into about 5 carrots in the gym who make you feel like shit and you leave feeling worse and go home and guzzle a few beers. DO NOT DO IT. Fight the urge and have tunnel vision till the first 5 pounds are off. Then after that move forward.

Alicia says in The Kind Diet, that it is okay to 'enjoy' life and have an occasional glass of wine. Hell, they have proven that having a glass of wine a day fights heart disease. By all means moderation is better than binging. In the meantime, consider each drink you have to be about 150 cals. Now, let's estimate. The average drinker on a Saturday night who is in college is taking in about 5 drinks. Multiply that by 5 and you have reached 750 calories. Leaving about zip to enjoy any food except a carrot for the rest of the day. Bad idea.

And for the vegans there is all organic wine available. It is rare and only comes by the one's but there is an option for the strict vegans. This, however, is not an option I am willing to pursue just yet. I love my wine. I can cut out everything for a little while. .But red wine will always have the best of me and I would rather have a glass of that then a sandwhich.

In conclusion remember, before you guzzle that beer, think about it, its gonna take you 10 minutes on the treadmill to burn just ONE.

It has been a mere pleasure to wake up to the sound of 40 mph winds and rain crashing against my windows. At the very least, I was extremely disappointed because I had this entire workout regimen that I was going to follow. A nice brisk run in the morning followed by countless abs and yoga moves and physical contraptions.I prefer running alone and letting my thoughts take my over- that way the run passes quick and i burn more calories than i thought. I always set my plans a little bit too high especially when it comes to working out. Extremely distraught, I set forth on my adventure to the, and you guessed it, the gym. It’s not that I don’t adore time at the gym it’s just, well, absolutely distracting. I mean let’s be honest, how hard is it to finish a set of lunges when you’re staring at hulk hogan’s look-a-like. And that is NOT a good thing. It becomes irritating and freaking disgusting because all this ‘hulk’ wannabe does is, pace through the maze of weights and ‘top-end’ equipment showing off his brown fake tan skin with bleached hair and the unforgettable cut off tee. And to make matters worse, one cannot help staring at the 450 lbs woman on the weight machine sitting in between her sets of 5 on the pull downs. I always find myself saying, ‘Good for her that she got off the couch and she’s in here, but lets do a little more than sets of 5.” Even sets of 8 are okay. But two sets of 5, which I am pretty sure was that I counted, was just a waste of time and energy. I’m not sure she even broke a sweat.

My theory is, if you come to the gym, use it. Oh and the best and biggest pet peeve of all? The girls who come to the gym like its a freaking beauty pageant. I think I saw a girl no older than 25 with full makeup on, a regular bra, and you guessed it, curled hair with nothing but cheerleading shorts and a sports bra on. Ok, she did look incredible I would have killed for her legs and her abs. But how is it even slightly or remotely comfortable to workout in stuff like that? She may as well come in in her bathing suit. Oh and heres the kicker, then you see a countless number of guys who have eyes magnentized to her. And then while the normal girls are working out you start feeling bad about yourself while you’re working out!!!!! Am I alone here? I mean I am happily taken in a fabulous relationship but getting attention or even acknowledgement is still a confidence builder. So then, going to the gym becomes this big hassel that meanwhile, all you wanted to do was break a sweat and leave feeling good. Its like a high school basketball team filled with politics. You have the ‘show-offs’, the ‘populars’, the ‘lazies’, and then the ones busting their asses (like myself)– getting absolutely zero recognition. Or am I wrong?

I had decided my last few weeks before I graduated college that I would focus steadily on my nutrition, working out, and studying for the big LSAT till I reached all my goals both tangible and intangible. So far I have devoured Alicia Silverstone’s book, “The Kind Diet”. First off it is a great read because there is a lot of environment talk in it. Yes, you read that right- discussion about the environment in a diet book. I thought it was extremely interesting having come off of an environmental sociology class last semester. There are great and convincing theories on why society should move towards a vegan regimen. This from the girl who cant get enough Chicken McNuggets and who loves a solid filet from The Striphouse in New York City. I had the best filet mignon of my life at that steak house in Soho, I highly recommend that to anyone who simply cannot process the idea of vegan in their minds.

http://www.striphouse.com/

*I highly suggest this if you’re planning a weekend getaway to the big city, it is on the pricey end but you won’t regret it, unless you are turned vegan.

To define, being vegan basically consists of cutting out any meat, fish and diary completely from one’s diet. Yes diary does include delicious cheese, and almost anything with white flour too- I think this idea sounds miserable. I eat chicken basically everyday and thought that losing weight meant nothing but meat, meat, meat! Horaay! However, Alicia (who I absolutely adore by the way), provides proof and enough facts that brings me to become skeptical of my meat loving-ness. Alicia believes that the killing of animals to provide the meat that is in your refrigerator or freezer right now is torture and that no living being should end their lives that way. I mean, yes that is convincing to me; however, I highly doubt because some select few believe that how we get our meat is cruel and filled with torture I really don’t think anything is going to change. I mean you can choose to not eat any meat or diary all you want, innocent cows and piggies are still going to be slaughtered. But what convinced me was the proof of thousands of what a vegetarian/vegan diet can do for your body, besides loose those extra lbs. There is proof left and right that cutting meat from the human diet can actually diminish common diseases and even cancers. Crazy? I thought so when I read the book, but then furthered my interest and just googled it left and right. A plant-based, meat-free diet can actually turn some situations completely around. I was shocked. There is testimony after testimony that a change of lifestyle and diet has actually done this. Is it for real or is it God’s hands at work?

I’m not really sure at all. But these testimonies were enough to make me want to try it. As someone diagnosed with Lupus. I face a lot of difficulty some days especially with pain. It is interesting because I have found testimonies online of lupus patients doing a change in diet like this, and their symptoms completely disappearing. I mean, you wouldn’t take a random pill without knowing what it will do to your body, why do we not treat food the same way?

Is it because we simply have too much weakness towards quickly-avaliable and fried food? I mean how many McDonald’s or Wendy’s do you see around? How far do you have to drive to go to a health food store or something that provides all natural diet options without pesticides and everything else on it? More and more supermarkets are accommodating the organic-obsessed individuals but there is still more that could be done. If you have healthy around you and its easy to get, then you in turn will just eat more good. I mean finding a restaurant around here that is vegan and accommodates that will be nearly impossible unless I always get a salad every time.

I haven’t completely made up my mind about going vegan. I have decided to completely cut out red meat though. *Rest in peace delicious filet mignon*. It will in turn be easier on my body and my bank account. I mean vegetables are not THAT pricey. I think I can afford that. In the mean time It is important to continue the research part of this and word towards a perm. lifestyle change.

My goal tonight will consist of napping, studying, and carefully picking out what’s for dinner. Update tomorrow.

The Kind Choice

Well, this is the beginning of a new start. I have officially graduated college and am off to make a new life style and a new me in the process. I recently purchased this book after a friend of mine told me about it. Of course, this was after I begged her to tell me what she was doing. She was about 10 pounds skinner (she completely didn't ned to lose anything, but looks great) and was glowing. Her story was one that was just the start. I had to research it and fell onto a website that was just one of the few. Thekindlife.com is an entire blog by Alicia Silverstone with forums of people following her way of life. This should be interesting. In the meantime, ladies and gentelmen- Goodnight.